two thousand and nine

We're staring at the New Year right in the face.
An exciting time for me.

Another year has passed... 2009 promises to bring lots of new things. In just over 3 weeks, I'll be turning 17, which means I can get my N (I'd advise you to stay off the sidewalks, let alone the roads). Sketchy, eh? When did I grow up?
Also in 2009, I'll be finishing my first year at a new school. Within the year, I'll be starting my last year of high school - now THAT'S crazy.

2008 has been a year of lots of struggles, hurdles and other challenges... But it has also been 360 days of continual blessings, and most definitely a learning experience. After some thought, I've come up with a word to summarize my 2008:

awakening

Over 2008 I've definitely had some major realizations. I won't get into too much detail, but, I've realized many things about myself, as well as about others, and the world in general. I think those realizations have mainly changed me for the better. God's done a lot of work in my life over the past 8760 hours.

Which brings me to my next point... My word for the upcoming year:

change

Change can be frightening, and change can be painful. But, there is no growth without pain. I've been scared of change mainly because it's a giant question mark. I'm not too fond of the unknown. But I believe a key part to Christianity and a relationship with God is willingness to change. So that's what I want to do as I enter 2009... I want to be willing to change.

Let’s face it, we talk about change, but we don’t handle change really well, and when we speak of change it isn’t frequently that we can do it with our whole hearts, without the voices of cynicism falling down around us like the dead leaves on Ohio running trails. The Hebrew writers of the Proverbs certainly studied nature, recognized the immediacy of change, and encouraged it with open arms (see also Bob Dylan’s version of the Proverb). But our faith is one built entirely on the promises of change. In fact, it is founded in the idea that change has already been resoundingly delivered.

-Matt Litton, Running Into Change (Relevant Magazine)

I believe that change is necessary. For me, for others, and the world on whole. Change is going to happen. Are you going to make change happen, or is it going to happen to you?

Take an active role in your life. I'm going to try with mine. As my youth pastor says, live with purpose. Think about what you are doing, and don't just stand around, waiting for God, or others, to do things for you. If we all start making conscious changes in our lives, I have a feeling that something good will happen.

Thou shalt not be a victim. Thou shalt not be a perpetrator. Above all, thou shalt not be a bystander.

- Holocaust Museum, Washington DC

There are only two ways of spreading light - to be the candle, or the mirror that reflects it.

-Edith Wharton, Novelist

Blessings to everyone for 2009.
Happy New Year.

Late-Night-Stumblings lead to Late-Night-Thoughts

If I profess with the loudest voice and clearest exposition
every portion of the truth of God except precisely that little
point which the world and the devil are at that moment
attacking, I am not confessing Christ, however boldly I
may be professing Christ.
Where the battle rages, there the loyalty of the soldier is proved, and to be steady on all the battlefield besides is mere flight and disgrace if he flinches at that point.

Martin Luther, Weimar Ausgabe Briefwechsel 3, 81f.

* * *

Our relatedness brings us into reality, provided we are open to it. For instance, we prefer to avoid those people who annoy us, upset us, rub us the wrong way, push our buttons. Yet these are precisely the people who can help us to grow. Our reaction to them exposes the egoism we try to hide, the fear we suppress, the spite we pretend isn’t there. Let’s ask ourselves, ‘Who is the person I most hate to be around?’ We need that very person in order to be real.

Relationships show us what’s truly happening in our life, if we have the courage to face it. They reveal this separate, unreal self of ours who wants to isolate us from the rest of the human race…. If we come to church on Sunday with the notion, ‘I’m here to be alone with God, I’m here to do my private devotion,’ we’re living in a dream world. There is no such thing as a solitary Christian.

Terence Grant, The Silence of Unknowing

* * *

Future historians--assuming there are any interested in such matters--are likely to conclude that the more we knew about Jesus the less we knew him, and the more precisely his words were translated the less we understood or heeded them.

Malcolm Muggeridge, Jesus: The Man Who Lives

* * *

The devil, things and people being what they are, it is necessary for God to use the hammer, the file and the furnace in His holy work of preparing a saint for true sainthood. It is doubtful whether God can bless a man greatly until He has hurt him deeply.
A.W. Tozer, The Root of the Righteous

* * *

There is no life without growth
There is no growth without pain

The Merry Christmas Post... On Boxing Day.

Okay, so, here's the Merry Christmas post.
Too bad it's on Boxing Day.

My Christmas Eve was great. Friends and neighbors came over, like they always do.
Christmas morning was great too. Mom, Dad, Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Mike, Tori and I all spent the morning together, eating a wonderful breakfast and then opening gifts...
The afternoon involved a lot of movie watching, copious amounts of napping and general chillage. A good Christmas all around.

My Gingerbread house of the Lord...
(click pictures to enlarge)

Electricity!

And as an added bonus...

Me playing some Christmas music on the accordion!

Hope that everyone had a very merry Christmas, and best wishes for the New Year!

Trip over something and suddenly I'm in over my head...

First off, merry Christmas.

Second, this will not be my true 'merry Christmas' post, most likely. That will come either later tonight or tomorrow... Complete with pictures, possibly even video. :O

* * *

So, as some people may have noticed...
I used to have a blog. Then I deleted it. Now, mysteriously, it is back. In case you were wondering why it's returned, here are some possible reasons why...

1. I like sharing my ideas.
I don't care much who I share them with, or if people actually even READ them.
The fact that there is the possibility that someone (anyone, technically) could be reading this post, my thoughts and ideas, really excites me.

2. I hate feeling alone.
You know when you are in a room, full of people, and yet you feel so alone? I feel like this quite frequently. I like being alone, but I don't like being lonely. It's a hard balance, and I think some people confuse the two things sometimes. My friend Matt posted on loneliness just over a month ago... And it's gotten me thinking. I don't want to be lonely anymore. I think that I want more people to know me. And not superficially know me. Actually know me. One thing though: I don't plan on revealing myself or anything on this blog... But practice makes perfect, and if I'm going to start letting people getting to know me, I should start practicing.

3. I used to think that people only wanted to here about interesting things...
I don't think I gave people enough credit. I decided to not even share what was going on in my life because I figured it would bore them/they would think I was wasting there time. Maybe, people don't care about awesome or cool things going on in my life... Maybe, just maybe, they actually care about me.

4. Writing posts makes me feel like a good writer.
...Just putting it out there.

* * *

I do lots of my thinking in my shower...
Correction:
I get a lot of thoughts in my shower, which causes me to think about them for the rest of the day...
(I have to write them down as soon as I'm out of the shower though, or else I'll forget what I was thinking by the time I'm finished getting ready)

The other day I was thinking this...
What would it be like to be alone for Christmas? I've been blessed to have family/friends with me every Christmas. Over the years, the numbers have declined, some traditions changed, but, in essence, my Christmas has been the same as long as I can remember.

Let alone being alone for Christmas, what would it be like to be alone, knowing your family is in the city, doing something without you...?

I won't share my thoughts on the question unless you ask, but that's just what's been floating around in my head the past week or so....

* * *

Heard this little piece during a lecture a few years back, stumbled across it on the web a few weeks ago...

I was hungry,
And you formed a humanities group to discuss my hunger.
I was imprisoned,
And you crept off quietly to your chapel and prayed for my release.
I was naked,
And in your mind you debated the morality of my appearance.
I was sick,
And you knelt and thanked God for your health.
I was homeless,
And you preached a sermon on the spiritual shelter of the love of God.
I was lonely,
And you left me alone to pray for me.
You seem so holy, so close to God
But I am still very hungry – and lonely – and cold.

Author Unknown (as far as I know)

Every time I read it, it hits me hard.
So true, so true...
I pray to God to change things, and then just wait for Him, or someone else, to do something.

A man looked around him in a city
street and saw a little girl poorly
dressed, shivering, and near
starving.

He was angry with God
and demanded: “Why don’t you do
something about this?” But God
did not answer.

The man went on, and saw a
wretched old man in the gutter.
Again he cried out: “ Why don’t
you do something?” But God was
silent.

In the middle of the night God
spoke to the man. He said gently,
“I have already done something
about these things. I made YOU,
with eyes to see, ears to hear,
and strong hands to help.”

I want/need to do something. For my sake, yours, and theirs.

~ The Pee

Post #1 or First White Christmas in 37 years

Welcome back to the inside of my brain.
I'm not sure what I'll do with this blog, but, in any case...

Merry Christmas.

Inspired by this time of year, I thought I'd post a happy little Christmas tune, followed by my thoughts.

I'm dreaming of a white christmas,
just like the ones I used to know
Where the treetops glisten and children listen
to hear sleigh bells in the snow

I don't know about you, but the only thing I'm listening for is the snow plow. Definitely no bells there.

I'm dreaming of a white christmas,
with every christmas card I write
May your days be merry and bright,
and may all your christmases be white

Yea, so, obviously this song has a love of sarcasm. Wishing that your days are merry AND your Christmases are white?! Comm'on. That's an oxymoron. You can't have merry days and snow. In my opinion, it just ain't possible.

And may all your christmases be white (All your christmases be white)
And may all your christmases be white (All your christmases be white)
And may all your christmases be
(All your christmases be white)
(All your christmases be white)

Obviously I hate whoever I am singing this song to.
I wish evil things upon them. Evil things like snow.

* * *

In other news, I am building an epic gingerbread house. It may fail, it may not. Currently I am working on electricity. We'll see how that goes. Stay tuned for pictures chronicling the building process.

* * *

Bahumbug.


~The Pee